Don't ask me what I got for Christmas

Why I dreaded starting the school term after Christmas

I was never bullied at school, but I was never one of the popular kids either, I was in that happy medium that required the least effort – I could just go by unnoticed if I wanted to. I was right where I wanted to be. No matter what position you held in the shitstorm of a school social-rank though, there was one question in January you could never avoid: “What did you get for Christmas?”. Continue reading “Why I dreaded starting the school term after Christmas”

Parent morning routine

My morning routine just got harder

Up until this week, my morning routine was manageable, just about. It was realistic – by no means easy – but I was aware that some people had it worse than I did. I didn’t complain. Kate’s just landed a new job, though, and it’s completely pissed on my chips, routine-wise. Continue reading “My morning routine just got harder”

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Do not touch my baby’s face!

Everyone loves newborn babies – they’re cute, they don’t chat shit and you can always find them right where you left them. For some reason though, people see a newborn baby and automatically assume they have the right to put their hands out and touch baby’s face! Why?! Continue reading “Do not touch my baby’s face!”

Hands covering womans face

5 undignified moments of parenthood

Pregnancy is the wrecking ball that obliterates both the internal structures of a woman and the foundations of both of our dignity. I started this blog with a view to being intolerably honest, and I feel I’ve not done this ethos justice if I skip this part. Here are the top five undignified moments of parenthood that we’ve endured.

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Philips OneBlade Razor review

Review: Philips OneBlade QP2530

The Philips OneBlade (QP2530) is Philips’s (Philips’?) answer to bridging the gap between an electric shaver and a beard trimmer. It’s aimed at those of us who want to style their facial hair (hence the funky shape). Philips claims the OneBlade is able to shave, trim and edge all lengths of hair. For me, the best part about the Philips OneBlade is its gentle shave – especially given my issues with shaving.
Continue reading “Review: Philips OneBlade QP2530”

child in background white text hello child

Level 1 complete: baby to toddler

Today is my daughter’s birthday party. She’s three years old – we managed to feed her enough nutrients and remove enough hazards for her to survive. Coming from a guy who electrocuted himself by touching a wire in Mexico “just to see if it was live”, this is pretty impressive stuff. Continue reading “Level 1 complete: baby to toddler”

Tommee Tippee Perfect Prep Machine Review

Review: Tommee Tippee Perfect Prep Machine

The Tommee Tippee Perfect Prep Machine claims to be able to make a bottle for your combination/formula-fed baby in less than two minutes. It’s accurate, adjustable in the amount of feed it makes and the bottle is ready to consume instantly. Awesome, right? Is it too good to be true? Continue reading “Review: Tommee Tippee Perfect Prep Machine”

One peg isolated from the group

Social life after becoming a parent

Friends are for life, not just prepartum

Friendships shift and change at different stages of life. We make childhood friends, then we start school and make new friends. Some friendships stick with us for years while others are discarded at the drop of a hat. Some friendships make it through the tough times and survive and they’re the unchanging constant in the equation of a turbulent timeline. That is, at least, until you have a childContinue reading “Social life after becoming a parent”

Breastfeeding vs formula feeding

Breastfeeding: Breast is best, but don’t be a tit about it!

Breastfeeding is heavily championed by parenting groups and medical professionals. It’s a subject of huge controversy and I’ve seen close friends at each other’s throats discussing it. Breastfeeding is up there with religion when it comes to causing arguments and woe betide anyone who uses the internet to discuss it. Well buckle up folks, I’m opinionated and brazen enough to say what I think on the matter, from public breast feeding to the use of formula… Continue reading “Breastfeeding: Breast is best, but don’t be a tit about it!”

Sleeping on teddy

“Sleep is for the weak!” – my daughter’s sleep pattern

It’s a curious thing – we crave, seek and pursue sleep but it’s essentially “dead time”. We don’t remember doing it but it takes up a third of our lives. If we don’t get enough of it we act like an arse and if we neglect it completely we just die. So why has mother nature decided that a newborn baby – something that takes a huge amount of concentration just to keep alive – will rob you of all but an hour’s kip here and there?! Continue reading ““Sleep is for the weak!” – my daughter’s sleep pattern”